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This is a song where I’m calling myself out on my shady behaviors. There’s a certain creepy factor in writing songs about women. which I do all over the album but not so much on this song, but still being a creepy piece of shit to this very day. This song is mostly about me.
* I would play the card game Speed in Algebra class with this girl who was very attractive but she was still nice and friendly to me (me some loser 14 year who most people didn’t care to interact with) .
At the end of the first day of sophomore year, she saw me in the hallway and called my name, I looked around and we made eye contact for a split second but I kept looking around, trying to act like I didn’t see her, because I was way to shy to actually walk up to her and say hello.

*At then end of this song I confess that I want to be a better man, but I don’t know how or where to begin.

lyrics

Playing speed in algebra
Gambling my lunch money
Sophomore year she called my name
I acted like I didn’t see her
(I’m) taking pills and blacking out
Waking up confused and lonely
-I was such an idiot a creepy piece of shit
Now I’m grown up
And there ain’t much different
All I do is say dream soap operas
In my head
Don’t know if I’m hungry
or starved for attention -
Mental Blocks
Addiction sucks
Why can’t I just be normal?
But what is that?
Who fucking knows
I just wanna be a good husband
Freaking out on LSD
How does she even love me?
-I was such an idiot a creepy piece of shit
Now I’m grown up
And there ain’t much different
All I do is say dream soap operas
In my head
Don’t know if I’m hungry
or starved for attention -
How can I be better?
How can I be better?
How can I be better?

credits

from Don​’​t Know if I​’​m Hungry or​.​.​. (2021), released April 11, 2021

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The Key Loser Corpus Christi, Texas

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